Retail Giggles

I went into the newsagent's shop around the corner to look for a magazine today, and when I got to the till, the clerk was in hysterics. The woman who had been just ahead of me had asked for a "Get Well" card, so when the clerk went to look for one, the customer said, "Oh that one will do!" and pulled one off the shelf. It said, "With Deepest Sympathy". Seems the death was rather sudden.

That reminded me of when I was about 18 and working for a store called Sterlings in Richardson, Texas. A man came in and bought a box of tampons and a box of condoms. My co-worker looked at him and asked, "Bad timing, huh?"

While I worked for the same store, which sold everything from toys, cosmetics, jewellry, appliances, electronics, and sporting goods, a woman I was checking out was complaining to her friend about the woman in the jewellry repairs department who wouldn't fix her watch as she wanted her to. She was so irate, she soon started calling the repair woman all sorts of names, with "bitch" being one of the calmer ones. I finally tired of listening to her and asked, "Could you please stop speaking like that about my mother?" It really was my mum she was talking about!

The clerk in the newagent's told me one of the other clerks worked for Marks and Spencer for 27 years, so she has lots of funny retail stories. One of them concerns a woman who brought a dressing gown back for a refund. She explained, "I put it on my mum, but it just didn't suit her, and I didn't want to bury her in something that didn't suit her!"