Diary Entry
9.52 am I've already started the day off with a moan on my other blog, so I'll try to behave and avoid repetition. I've taken my medication, and when it kicks in, I should be back to normal-ish.
It was almost heart breaking dropping Ricky and Jack off at school this morning. I say "almost" because I know they'll be home next Wednesday at lunch time. We can have a mini-Christmas and birthday party then. I can always call Jack on his birthday Thursday, but it's not the same. I'm sure his dad says the same thing when it's my year to have them the first half of the Christmas holidays.
They took their presents in to the teachers and were so excited to do so they pretty much forgot about me. Jack always makes me pick him up for a "big hug". No wonder my back is so sore. He's a tall six-almost-seven-year-old. Most of the time he won't let me leave without a struggle, but in the excitement over Christmas, he even forgot to wave good-bye to me at the window. Oh well, that's nothing to cry over. Not much anyway.
My friend Gary is still waiting to hear whether his divorce is final or not. I know how he feels. The courts are terrible that way in the US. I guess they intentionally make it difficult in the US to keep people from getting divorces, but I honestly don't think that does any good. I don't think it's right for the system to try to make it hard for people to get away from an abusive spouse, for example. People who really want a divorce are going to get a divorce. I think they should make it harder to get married. People are living together anyway; if they really want to get married, they should have to pass some kind of a test, like you do for your driving license. Okay, maybe not. I'm just rambling now.
Divorce is less complicated here, mostly because child custody is treated as a completely separate issue. My divorce took as long as it did because of the ex, not the system. He filed for the divorce and then sat on it until the last possible moment. When my solicitor said she was going to petition to have his application dismissed so I could start my own, he signed. Over and done with in a matter of a few days.
11.30 am I am so mentally drained it's unreal. I've told Simon how tired I am, hoping he'd offer to come in and take over for the afternoon, but no joy. He's going to his friend Coke's house. Just my luck. I'm so exhausted I'm near tears. I wanted to get a start on my criminal law essay by the end of the week, but I wanted to have a bit of a break before hand. Now I'm afraid that I'm going to be rushing to get two essays done at the last minute again because I also have to research and write my criminological research methods essay. Once those are done, I have to read for my criminological theory exam. Instead I think for now I'm going to make a cup of coffee and start reading Martin Brundle's book. I need to read for pleasure, maybe that will help me unwind.
3.02 pm It hasn't helped me unwind, I'm afraid, but it is a very interesting book. Already I've been enthralled by Martin's experience during the first Grand Prix in Melbourne, Australia. I am just desperate to go home. Simon asked what I want to do tonight since we have no kids. I said "absolutely nothing". Not a single thing. I want to curl up under the quilt and just warm up and vegetate. I'm so exhausted now my muscles are twitching.
4.56 pm What a strange experience! Just after I finished writing the above paragraph, I had a phone call. At first I thought it was my neighbour Steve because the caller asked if I was still facing my computer screen. Steve knows I'm always on the computer, and it sounded like his voice. But then the stranger said, "Every time I walk past your shop, you're facing the computer. I only ever see the back of your head." I thought it must be David from the computer shop next door, who is also one of my neighbours, except then the caller said, "It would be nice to see you turn around some time." He mentioned that he lived very close. That spooked me. There are some flats above the shops across the road, and I was a bit creeped out that he could live there and be watching me. The shop phone number is on the sign over the door, too. He asked what I looked at on the internet and whether I go in any chat rooms. That was the weirdest bit, otherwise he was very polite. After that he asked me out to lunch or if I'd like to go for coffee. I replied that I didn't think my husband would appreciate it very much if I did. All I know is the guy's name is Ian. I was so shaken up I had Simon come up there with me. I didn't want to walk to my car alone in the dark. Simon also had a word with David and told him to keep his ears open, and David gave him a slip of paper with his shop number on in case I needed help.
My mate Doyle said of course he'd want to ask me out. After all, I'm a Texas gal so I can't be all that bad. Doyle's only seen pics of me because, even though we went to the same school, we never met until we both joined our high school message board. On the other hand, my mate Graham said the poor guy must be mental for asking me out for coffee! Typical Graham.
9.57 pm I had two glasses of Baileys when I got home, watched "The Crocodile Hunter Movie" and passed out for two hours. I definitely feel less stressed. I'm still weirded out about that phone call though. But I'm going to do something completely useless. I think I'll sit and play on the Playstation.
It was almost heart breaking dropping Ricky and Jack off at school this morning. I say "almost" because I know they'll be home next Wednesday at lunch time. We can have a mini-Christmas and birthday party then. I can always call Jack on his birthday Thursday, but it's not the same. I'm sure his dad says the same thing when it's my year to have them the first half of the Christmas holidays.
They took their presents in to the teachers and were so excited to do so they pretty much forgot about me. Jack always makes me pick him up for a "big hug". No wonder my back is so sore. He's a tall six-almost-seven-year-old. Most of the time he won't let me leave without a struggle, but in the excitement over Christmas, he even forgot to wave good-bye to me at the window. Oh well, that's nothing to cry over. Not much anyway.
My friend Gary is still waiting to hear whether his divorce is final or not. I know how he feels. The courts are terrible that way in the US. I guess they intentionally make it difficult in the US to keep people from getting divorces, but I honestly don't think that does any good. I don't think it's right for the system to try to make it hard for people to get away from an abusive spouse, for example. People who really want a divorce are going to get a divorce. I think they should make it harder to get married. People are living together anyway; if they really want to get married, they should have to pass some kind of a test, like you do for your driving license. Okay, maybe not. I'm just rambling now.
Divorce is less complicated here, mostly because child custody is treated as a completely separate issue. My divorce took as long as it did because of the ex, not the system. He filed for the divorce and then sat on it until the last possible moment. When my solicitor said she was going to petition to have his application dismissed so I could start my own, he signed. Over and done with in a matter of a few days.
11.30 am I am so mentally drained it's unreal. I've told Simon how tired I am, hoping he'd offer to come in and take over for the afternoon, but no joy. He's going to his friend Coke's house. Just my luck. I'm so exhausted I'm near tears. I wanted to get a start on my criminal law essay by the end of the week, but I wanted to have a bit of a break before hand. Now I'm afraid that I'm going to be rushing to get two essays done at the last minute again because I also have to research and write my criminological research methods essay. Once those are done, I have to read for my criminological theory exam. Instead I think for now I'm going to make a cup of coffee and start reading Martin Brundle's book. I need to read for pleasure, maybe that will help me unwind.
3.02 pm It hasn't helped me unwind, I'm afraid, but it is a very interesting book. Already I've been enthralled by Martin's experience during the first Grand Prix in Melbourne, Australia. I am just desperate to go home. Simon asked what I want to do tonight since we have no kids. I said "absolutely nothing". Not a single thing. I want to curl up under the quilt and just warm up and vegetate. I'm so exhausted now my muscles are twitching.
4.56 pm What a strange experience! Just after I finished writing the above paragraph, I had a phone call. At first I thought it was my neighbour Steve because the caller asked if I was still facing my computer screen. Steve knows I'm always on the computer, and it sounded like his voice. But then the stranger said, "Every time I walk past your shop, you're facing the computer. I only ever see the back of your head." I thought it must be David from the computer shop next door, who is also one of my neighbours, except then the caller said, "It would be nice to see you turn around some time." He mentioned that he lived very close. That spooked me. There are some flats above the shops across the road, and I was a bit creeped out that he could live there and be watching me. The shop phone number is on the sign over the door, too. He asked what I looked at on the internet and whether I go in any chat rooms. That was the weirdest bit, otherwise he was very polite. After that he asked me out to lunch or if I'd like to go for coffee. I replied that I didn't think my husband would appreciate it very much if I did. All I know is the guy's name is Ian. I was so shaken up I had Simon come up there with me. I didn't want to walk to my car alone in the dark. Simon also had a word with David and told him to keep his ears open, and David gave him a slip of paper with his shop number on in case I needed help.
My mate Doyle said of course he'd want to ask me out. After all, I'm a Texas gal so I can't be all that bad. Doyle's only seen pics of me because, even though we went to the same school, we never met until we both joined our high school message board. On the other hand, my mate Graham said the poor guy must be mental for asking me out for coffee! Typical Graham.
9.57 pm I had two glasses of Baileys when I got home, watched "The Crocodile Hunter Movie" and passed out for two hours. I definitely feel less stressed. I'm still weirded out about that phone call though. But I'm going to do something completely useless. I think I'll sit and play on the Playstation.
posted by Melinda at 12/20/2004 11:44:00 pm
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