Diary Entry
11.59 am I'm finding it hard to tell what day of the week it is! With no school to take kids to or to go to myself, the shop being open very little because of holidays, bank holidays and Sundays, I can't tell which way is up anymore! I can't wait to get back into a routine. I know I said a couple of weeks ago that I couldn't wait for the break, but although I'm enjoying the relaxation of the holidays, I'm bored. After my IKEA run this afternoon, I think I'll hit the books.
Poor Pete, he's bored, too. I had a message from him when I logged in. He's stuck in a house full of women who either have PMT or the flu. Poor man. I have the opposite problem. I'm stuck in a house full of blokes (apart from Malorie). I think I'll take Malorie shopping with me so she can escape the testosterone rush too. Geez, even the dog is male. We're desperately outnumbered, and since we're expecting Daniel, it's going to get worse. We definitely need some girlie time! I try to do girl stuff with her, just mum and daughter, but things have been so hectic lately. I think I'll add that to my list of goals for 2005 -- spend more girlie time with my daughter!
The thing that bothers me most about Malorie is how materialistic she is. I'm not. I like having "things", but at the end of the day, they're only "things". They make life interesting at times, and they make life more comfortable, but they don't make life. A few weeks ago, she wasn't really looking forward to going to her dad's house for Christmas. She said there were no boys there. Understandable. She's 15 and boy mad. I was exactly the same. Now that she's back from her dad's, she's gushing over "He said he'll buy me this if I come to live with him" or "He's bought me such-and-such but I can only use it at his house".
It's not that she's closer to her dad than she is to me. It's that she's so much like him. He's very materialistic, too. He used to rant at me because he couldn't have all the things that other people have. It hit it's peak when his sister Lisa and her husband Alex bought their first house. He blamed me for the fact that we were still renting, conveniently forgetting it was he who made me quit university after my first year. I was the one who tried to make something of myself by taking a job as a newspaper editor, an idea he hated because I made more money than he did. That was unacceptable. When I went back to university, it was on the understanding that I would become a school teacher. That was an acceptable job for a woman. But then my goals changed as my confidence grew, and I decided that I was definitely going to teach, but not until I earned my MA and PhD.
He owns his own house now. I feel no jealousy whatsoever. I have never owned my own house, but I have never had the headaches that go with home ownership. It is one of my goals for this year to set the ball rolling so we can buy this house, but if it doesn't happen, we're no worse off than we are at this moment. It won't change the house. It will only change the paperwork and responsibility. At the moment, if something goes wrong, the council come out and repair the problem at no charge to us. I like that. But there's also very little security with it if the council were to decide to sell off their housing to private firms. That's unlikely in the immediate future, but it could happen.
4.48 pm I've had my IKEA fix, but boy! was it packed! I didn't think there would be that many people there! We had to park in an alternative car park, there were so many cars. But I got the storage thing for the boys' room. It's not so much a chest of drawers as a storage system, but it'll do until I get them the wardrobes I've seen at Argos. They have drawers built into them, and that will save a lot of room. They can use this storage thing for their toys then. Of course I spent a lot more than I intended, but less than I'd budgeted for. That's good.
Malorie and I had a chat about her moving to her dad's when she's 18. She says she's so confused, and it's because he's pressuring her to move. I told her not to even think about it right now, and when her dad pushes her, just say she'll make that decision when the time comes. I pointed out that I was engaged to her dad when I was 18, and while I don't want her to get married that young, it just shows how she needs to keep her options open. I don't know if it sunk in, but we'll see. Some of the things she told me about her dad really worry me.
5.30 pm Speak of the devil and he shall call on the telephone ...
7.07 pm Arrrrrgh! ITV showed a review of the 2004 season this afternoon, and I completely forgot about it! It doesn't look like they're going to replay it either. That sucks.
I sent Malorie and Braden down to the shop to get some electric tokens, and the silly beggars set off without taking any money with them. Is that a blonde moment or what? Well, they're both blonde, so it fits.
Yes, Malorie and Braden's dad phoned to speak to them this afternoon, and of course, he tried to get Malorie to take me on a stroll down memory lane -- "Ask your mama about when I got electricuted while talking on the phone while it was raining". If he was talking on the phone at the time, he wasn't talking to me. All I knew was in early 1985 he came to pick me up from school one day and said he'd had to go to hospital because a bolt of lightning hit the front of his house, went through the metal window frame, into the metal tool chest under his bedroom window, and into him. He got a bit of a zap, that's all. Hardly a serious case of electricution. If it had been serious, I don't think he would have been there giving me a ride home from school! Listening to Malorie talk to him on the phone, I can't help but shake my head and wonder what I ever saw in him. At least with ex-hubby number two, I can work out why I fell for him and married him. Not so with ex-hubby number one.
I tried to tell Malorie how unimportant material possessions are by using the Asian tsunami as an example. I pointed out how so many people lost everything they owned, material things are so fleeting. They break, they are stolen, they run out, they become outdated. She thought about it for a while, so maybe one day I will get through to her.
10.27 pm I think taking Malorie with me today was a good idea. She's hardly left my side all day, she's done what I've asked her to without complaining, and she keeps telling me she loves me. Wow. I musta done good.
Simon wasn't impressed at me posting his picture on here. He said it's not fair because I won't let him take a picture of me. I said it is fair because it's my camera.
I did a funky Sunday dinner today. Sort of traditional English meets puddled Texan. Roast chicken, mashed potatoes, Yorkshire puddings and Ranch Style Beans. I love Ranch Style Beans! My mum always sends me a few cans when the kids come back from Dallas, and while I usually hoard them, I decided to open 2 cans tonight! Jack is the only one who wouldn't eat them, and Ricky only ate a few. Ricky eats anything that comes from America because he's so proud of the fact he was born in Texas.
Pete's starting up a new forum for writers. He's been saying that for almost as long as I've known him (going on two years now) but with the end of Fiction Addiction's forum, maybe he'll up-and-do-it now. I'm hoping so anyway. I've posted a bit on my other blog about it.
11.38 pm So much for my goal of staying on top of my studies! I still haven't started either one of my essays, and criminal law is due a week tomorrow! I'm determined to get some work done on it, even if I have to go sit in the empty shop tomorrow to do it. It'll be quieter there, and I have the computer to use. Well, we'll see. I still have to get Malorie, Ricky and Jack all new trousers for school before they start back on Wednesday.
I took the "Dante's Inferno Test", and looks like I'm going to the third level of hell for being Gluttonous! No surprise there! I was kind of hoping for Lustfulness myself, but I think my love of chocolate outweighed my love of sex, in their scoring system anyway!
12.43 am I suppose I should go to bed, but I'm feeling a bit restless. Too much coffee, maybe. I've just written the most boring list of what all I bought at IKEA on my other blog. How daft is that? I wish there were someone around to chat to, but no one is online tonight. Tomorrow night I'll be writing an essay. I'll bet everyone is around then!
Poor Pete, he's bored, too. I had a message from him when I logged in. He's stuck in a house full of women who either have PMT or the flu. Poor man. I have the opposite problem. I'm stuck in a house full of blokes (apart from Malorie). I think I'll take Malorie shopping with me so she can escape the testosterone rush too. Geez, even the dog is male. We're desperately outnumbered, and since we're expecting Daniel, it's going to get worse. We definitely need some girlie time! I try to do girl stuff with her, just mum and daughter, but things have been so hectic lately. I think I'll add that to my list of goals for 2005 -- spend more girlie time with my daughter!
The thing that bothers me most about Malorie is how materialistic she is. I'm not. I like having "things", but at the end of the day, they're only "things". They make life interesting at times, and they make life more comfortable, but they don't make life. A few weeks ago, she wasn't really looking forward to going to her dad's house for Christmas. She said there were no boys there. Understandable. She's 15 and boy mad. I was exactly the same. Now that she's back from her dad's, she's gushing over "He said he'll buy me this if I come to live with him" or "He's bought me such-and-such but I can only use it at his house".
It's not that she's closer to her dad than she is to me. It's that she's so much like him. He's very materialistic, too. He used to rant at me because he couldn't have all the things that other people have. It hit it's peak when his sister Lisa and her husband Alex bought their first house. He blamed me for the fact that we were still renting, conveniently forgetting it was he who made me quit university after my first year. I was the one who tried to make something of myself by taking a job as a newspaper editor, an idea he hated because I made more money than he did. That was unacceptable. When I went back to university, it was on the understanding that I would become a school teacher. That was an acceptable job for a woman. But then my goals changed as my confidence grew, and I decided that I was definitely going to teach, but not until I earned my MA and PhD.
He owns his own house now. I feel no jealousy whatsoever. I have never owned my own house, but I have never had the headaches that go with home ownership. It is one of my goals for this year to set the ball rolling so we can buy this house, but if it doesn't happen, we're no worse off than we are at this moment. It won't change the house. It will only change the paperwork and responsibility. At the moment, if something goes wrong, the council come out and repair the problem at no charge to us. I like that. But there's also very little security with it if the council were to decide to sell off their housing to private firms. That's unlikely in the immediate future, but it could happen.
4.48 pm I've had my IKEA fix, but boy! was it packed! I didn't think there would be that many people there! We had to park in an alternative car park, there were so many cars. But I got the storage thing for the boys' room. It's not so much a chest of drawers as a storage system, but it'll do until I get them the wardrobes I've seen at Argos. They have drawers built into them, and that will save a lot of room. They can use this storage thing for their toys then. Of course I spent a lot more than I intended, but less than I'd budgeted for. That's good.
Malorie and I had a chat about her moving to her dad's when she's 18. She says she's so confused, and it's because he's pressuring her to move. I told her not to even think about it right now, and when her dad pushes her, just say she'll make that decision when the time comes. I pointed out that I was engaged to her dad when I was 18, and while I don't want her to get married that young, it just shows how she needs to keep her options open. I don't know if it sunk in, but we'll see. Some of the things she told me about her dad really worry me.
5.30 pm Speak of the devil and he shall call on the telephone ...
7.07 pm Arrrrrgh! ITV showed a review of the 2004 season this afternoon, and I completely forgot about it! It doesn't look like they're going to replay it either. That sucks.
I sent Malorie and Braden down to the shop to get some electric tokens, and the silly beggars set off without taking any money with them. Is that a blonde moment or what? Well, they're both blonde, so it fits.
Yes, Malorie and Braden's dad phoned to speak to them this afternoon, and of course, he tried to get Malorie to take me on a stroll down memory lane -- "Ask your mama about when I got electricuted while talking on the phone while it was raining". If he was talking on the phone at the time, he wasn't talking to me. All I knew was in early 1985 he came to pick me up from school one day and said he'd had to go to hospital because a bolt of lightning hit the front of his house, went through the metal window frame, into the metal tool chest under his bedroom window, and into him. He got a bit of a zap, that's all. Hardly a serious case of electricution. If it had been serious, I don't think he would have been there giving me a ride home from school! Listening to Malorie talk to him on the phone, I can't help but shake my head and wonder what I ever saw in him. At least with ex-hubby number two, I can work out why I fell for him and married him. Not so with ex-hubby number one.
I tried to tell Malorie how unimportant material possessions are by using the Asian tsunami as an example. I pointed out how so many people lost everything they owned, material things are so fleeting. They break, they are stolen, they run out, they become outdated. She thought about it for a while, so maybe one day I will get through to her.
10.27 pm I think taking Malorie with me today was a good idea. She's hardly left my side all day, she's done what I've asked her to without complaining, and she keeps telling me she loves me. Wow. I musta done good.
Simon wasn't impressed at me posting his picture on here. He said it's not fair because I won't let him take a picture of me. I said it is fair because it's my camera.
I did a funky Sunday dinner today. Sort of traditional English meets puddled Texan. Roast chicken, mashed potatoes, Yorkshire puddings and Ranch Style Beans. I love Ranch Style Beans! My mum always sends me a few cans when the kids come back from Dallas, and while I usually hoard them, I decided to open 2 cans tonight! Jack is the only one who wouldn't eat them, and Ricky only ate a few. Ricky eats anything that comes from America because he's so proud of the fact he was born in Texas.
Pete's starting up a new forum for writers. He's been saying that for almost as long as I've known him (going on two years now) but with the end of Fiction Addiction's forum, maybe he'll up-and-do-it now. I'm hoping so anyway. I've posted a bit on my other blog about it.
11.38 pm So much for my goal of staying on top of my studies! I still haven't started either one of my essays, and criminal law is due a week tomorrow! I'm determined to get some work done on it, even if I have to go sit in the empty shop tomorrow to do it. It'll be quieter there, and I have the computer to use. Well, we'll see. I still have to get Malorie, Ricky and Jack all new trousers for school before they start back on Wednesday.
I took the "Dante's Inferno Test", and looks like I'm going to the third level of hell for being Gluttonous! No surprise there! I was kind of hoping for Lustfulness myself, but I think my love of chocolate outweighed my love of sex, in their scoring system anyway!
12.43 am I suppose I should go to bed, but I'm feeling a bit restless. Too much coffee, maybe. I've just written the most boring list of what all I bought at IKEA on my other blog. How daft is that? I wish there were someone around to chat to, but no one is online tonight. Tomorrow night I'll be writing an essay. I'll bet everyone is around then!
posted by Melinda at 1/01/2005 11:34:00 pm
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