Nice Girls Don't Always Finish First

I'm having my own private pity party today. Well, that's what we used to call it when I was a kid: a "pity party". That's where you sit there and feel totally sorry for yourself. I'm having that kind of day.

Why is it that the nicer you are, the worse you feel? I know I don't have a lot to offer except my personality, which I'm not feeling very confident of at the moment, but to some people, it's just not good enough. I'd probably get further by being a total bitch instead of the nice, soft, easygoing person I've turned out to be.

Whoever said you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar wasn't right when it comes to my life. I grew up believing that, when I should have been taught to treat 'em mean and keep 'em keen!

I'm sure I'll snap out of this low spell soon. Another quirk of my character.


A friend from my school days sent me this in response to my posting the same thing on MySpace. I hope it works on here as well:

-----------------Girls-------------------
------------are like apples-------------------
--------on trees. The best ones-----------
------are at the top of the tree.--------
----The boys don't want to reach------
---for the good ones because they ------
-are afraid of falling and getting hurt.----
Instead, they just get the rotten apples-
---from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
-something is wrong with them, when in
--reality, they're amazing. They just
---have to wait for the right boy to-------
----- come along, the one who's-----------
----------- brave enough to-----------------
-----------------climb all----------------------
----------------- the way---------------------
-----------------to the top--------------------
---------------- of the tree.------------------

What a Crowd!

I've taken to spending Monday evenings at the pub for a quiz, but that's just an excuse. Who could not enjoy hanging out with a group like this?


Dale, Christian and Neil


Me and Vicky


Christian, who doesn't normally look like that, I promise!


Rich trying to play darts ...

Pics from Kate's Wedding!

Kate and Sarah after the ceremony at Newstead Abbey


The F1 cars on the cake!


Me by the lake at the reception venue, Lakeside Tower


Kate and me


Sarah, Kate and me -- the Mark Webber Supporters Club!


Kate, Rich and me


Me and Rich

Kate's Getting Married Tomorrow!

I've been looking to tomorrow for months! Kate is getting married in Nottinghamshire, and I'm going to the wedding and reception. I missed the hen night, unfortunately, because of my stupid gall bladder, but I'm determined that I'm not going to miss the wedding!

Kate and her maid of honour Sarah, who has flown all the way from Australia to be here, came by on Wednesday, and I'm amazed at how calm Kate is. She seemed more nervous about meeting Mark Webber than about marrying Greg! I'm sure that's a very good thing.

I didn't find a "date" to take with me -- too much of a hassle finding someone to take to a friend's wedding -- but my friend Rich said he would be happy to escort me to it. He's a lot of fun and we enjoy each other's company, so I'm sure we'll have a good time. Besides, I've seen him in his work uniform, I've seen him stripped down to his pants in an Irish pub ... now I get to see him in a suit!

I just wish Diana could have come over from the Netherlands for the wedding. Oh and her husband Martin, too, even if he is a Michael Schumacher fan! It would have been so great to have them over here!

Happy Monday?

Hosted by Sparkle Tags

More Q&A

Q: How many beds did you lay in yesterday?
A: None, fell asleep in the living room

Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
A: Light blue

Q: Name one thing that you do everyday?
A: Brush my teeth

Q: Whats the color of your bedroom walls?
A: Cream, but hopefully I will be moving soon, and I'm trying to decide what colour I want to do my bedroom in my new house!

Q: How much cash do you have on you right now?
A: £10, which will soon be spent on gas for the house (I'm on a pay as you go meter)

Q: Whats your favorite sport?
A: Formula One, as if no one knew that!

Q: I cant wait till..?
A: My student loan comes, but before then it's Kate's wedding!

Q: When was the last time you saw your dad?
A: September 2002 when my parents came over for my last wedding (and by last I mean last wedding)

Q: What did you have for dinner last night?
A: Chicken Dippers wrapped in a tortilla, one of my own weird creations

Q: Look to your left. Whats there?
A: My pillow, I slept down here last night cuz I have a cold and can't breathe

Q: Whats the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
A: My daughter's trainers because I can't find mine

Q: What websites do you visit the most?
A: MySpace, ITV F1, my blog

Q: Do you have plants in your room?
A: No, had to leave them behind when I fled my old house, but I will replace them after I move in a few weeks

Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
A: My throat, which makes a nice change from my gall bladder hurting so I can't complain much

Q: What city was your last taxicab ride in?
A: Chesterfield, if you count that as a city. Otherwise it would be Brussels.

Q: Do you own a picture phone?
A: Yes but it's old and crappy

Q: Whats your favorite starbucks drink?
A: Only ever been once and don't remember what I had, probably a mocha something

Q: Recent time you were really upset?
A: All weekend, a close friend doesn't seem to be speaking to me
Edit: I'm feeling much better ... just had a phone call ... I was being paranoid again, but that's nothing new

Q: Would you have a problem if your friend went after your ex boyfriend/girlfriend?
A: Depends on what friend and what ex but I can't say it would bother me very much

Last..
1. Person you saw: Jack, because he's sitting next to me
2. Hugged: Jack
3. Place you shopped: ASDA
4. Song you listened to: When Love and Death Embrace - HIM

Today..
1. What are you doing now: Answering Questions
2. What are you doing tonight: Homework, can't afford to go to the pub
3. What are you going to eat for lunch: Not hungry

Tomorrow..
1. Is: going to be boring though I might go to pub quiz
2. Got any plans: More homework because I'm WAY behind on my dissertation and want to have it finished by the end of the week
3. Goal: I don't want to cry anymore but have a feeling I will, lots of stress
4. Dislikes: Peas, but what's that got to do with tomorrow? I've always hated peas
5. Do you have to work: No and lectures are finished at uni

Currently..
1. Currently love someone: Yes very much so, my kids are everything to me and I love my friends and family
2. Like someone: There are not many people I don't like, which you can probably tell seeing as how I'm friends with one of my ex-husbands!
3. Have a boyfriend/girlfriend: Nope to both
4. Does someone like you?: Original answer was I hope so, but I stand corrected as Gary says of course people like me ...
5. Missing someone: Desperately, my family in Texas and my friend who has stopped speaking to me over the weekend.
Edit: See other edit above about me being paranoid.

My Reputation Continues to Fall ...

I discovered yesterday that my reputation for being a whore seems to be following me around. I ran into Dennis, my former criminal law tutor and the person responsible for me going to Europe in February, on campus yesterday. It was the first time I'd spoken to him since we returned from the trip.

First, he couldn't get over how much weight I've lost. He was one of the few people who noticed I'd lost any weight at all back in October when classes first started. I said it was partly due to being in hospital recently, but also due to the fact that I'm now single.

He replied, "Yes, I heard that you left your husband because you slept with Trucker in Brussels". (Trucker is his nickname for Rich since he's a lorry driver.)

Unfortunately, with Dennis, if you don't have a snappy reply instantly, you'll never convince him of the truth, so after I hesitated he just grinned and asked if I'm still seeing him. I gathered my wits together enough to tell him that Rich has been a wonderful friend to me lately. I don't think Dennis believed me, especially when I walked over to a table with my coffee in time for Rich to show up and ask me if I was ready to leave! We've been sharing driving duties since we live fairly close to each other.

Oh well. Rich thought it was funny anyway.

I'm an Ideal Lover

Your Seduction Style: Ideal Lover

You seduce people by tapping into their dreams and desires. And because of this sensitivity, you can be the ideal lover for anyone you seek. You are a shapeshifter - bringing romance, adventure, spirituality to relationships. It all depends on who your with, and what their vision of a perfect relationship is.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

Definition of Love

It's amazing what you think of when you spend a lot of time in your own company! I happen to like myself, but I do come up with some odd-ball stuff when I'm alone! Last night when my mate Rich was under the influence of quite a bit of beer and wine, he got on his soapbox about how people don't know what love is, and on telly tonight I heard someone say pretty much the same thing, so now that it's me who has had a drink (or two …) I've come up with my own definition, and you can either laugh at it or disagree with it or just tell me to shut the fuck up, but I think it's a pretty good one.

To me there are lots of different kinds of love but all of them have the same ingredients no matter if it's love for your child, your parents, your significant other, a friend or someone who doesn't even know you love them but admire from afar.

First there's the fact that you know you're going to have times when you argue and fall out, but it doesn't matter because you know that you still love them regardless and soon forget what the argument was about.

Second is that you are happy when you're with them and feel something missing when you're apart, but you just look forward to the next time you're together rather than dwell on the fact you aren't together at that particular time.

Third is making sacrifices for the person you love, whether it's your material possessions, your time or your energy. I would give the shirt off my back for someone I love, but I would also give my life for them if that would save theirs. Love is also sacrificing your own happiness because it's more important for the person you love to be happy than to be happy yourself.

Fourth is knowing that sometimes the person you love is going to make mistakes, but you love them regardless and are still there to pick up the pieces when things go wrong without judging them.

And fifth it's loving someone for who they are now and not who you think they might be if you worked to change them.

Now don't go telling anyone how soppy I am … Sthe words coming out of my mouth don't make sense to anyone but me (must be the accent), but if I put them into written words they have half a chance of sounding reasonably sane.